The weekend roundup 12/1-12/5. The Ron Fucking Santo edition!

Santo to the Hall! Tiger Woods! The Honeybadger for the Heisman! Gretzkys daughter is hottttt! also Deron Williams jersey is retired by Arabs, D-Jax throws a big ass party, Rolando McLain cheeses for the camera,  “Dickering” is apparently a real word, Southern Miss should be BCS bound (pfffffrt), 16-0 is annoying as fuck, TEBOW yet again and The Lions get a new penalty named in their honor.

The Mullets favorite Cub of all time Ron Santo was named to the MLB Hall of Fame, finally, one year to the day after he passed away. The Mullet was at Wrigley in August when the Cubs erected Santos statue and could not happier for the Santo family. Its just too bad it could not have happened earlier. Way to go Ronnie, all Cub fans have Pass10n for ole #10. Congrats old timer, it was long past due. It’s just too bad that we have been cheated out of seeing what would have been one of the greatest hall of fame acceptance speeches of all time. The Mullet loves you Ron and will always miss you calling Cub games on the radio (tear).

In golf Tiger Woods finally won a tournament this weekend subsequently pissing off self-righteous women everywhere that conveniently forget that bitches cheat too.  Go Tiger!

In NCAA foozball news, the Honeybadger was selected as one of the Heisman finalist after his stellar SEC title game performance in which he ran back a punt, made everyone in red look like fucking idiots on another punt return where he nearly scored and recovered a fumble that he was no where near when the ball was dropped. In the Mullets opinion he is the greatest DB since Michigan’s Charles Woodsen and the most exciting DB since Neon Deion.

The Honey Badger will get a chance at a national title in a rematch against the Tide. Many are disappointed that the Tigers will not face OK State in the title game but in a generation that loves the UFC, this game will provide all the violence of a MMA match times 1000  “lads out to hurt each other” – Turkish (Snatch)

In other NCAA conference title games Southern Miss Coach Larry Fedora claimed that “we should be in a BCS bowl” after defeating Houston in the Conference USA title game. Larry would have better suited to request a rematch against Marshall who beat the shit out of them earlier this season. Hey Larry; reality just called and said shut the fuck up dickbag.

In the NFL the Fudge Packers got taken down to the wire by the slumping Giants but still pulled out a win which condemned all sports fans to have to listen to the most fucking idiotic question in sports history “can you go undefeated” “should you rest your starters” “should you play them the whole game”. If I was Aaron Rodgers I would ask “If you stick your thumb in your ass while whacking off does it make you gay?”

Fuck I hate this question! It ranks up there with the “if a tree falls in the woods and nobody is around does it make a sound?” Here is the answer…THERE IS NO FUCKING RIGHT ANSWER!!! The Colts rested starters, they lost, the Patriots played their starters and lost. SO shut the fuck up! Please! In case you didn’t know the Mullet HATES the media, except Erin Andrews who could ask me the thumb up the butt question anytime she damn well pleases. Which the Mullet would answer: As long as its her thumb in my ass lets get it on!

In the dirty NOLA Sunday night the Lions proved that they are the dumbest fucking team in NFL history after they shot their self in the again and again with stupid penalties and causing NFL commish Roger Goodell to ponder a new penalty called the “what are you fucking stupid?” penalty (or the Suh penalty) for 15 yards everytime an NFL player does something juvenile costing his team a ton of yards and the win.

In the Twin cities Tebow gave another “forget you” (because he doesn’t cuss of course) to all his haters at ESPN as he won a shootout against the Vikes.

In off the field news Raiders linebacker Rolando Mcclain was involved in a shooting in Alabama during the week raising this question; 1 why the fuck were you in Alabama during a critical week for your team and 2nd, why in the fuck did you make this face while being arrested?

Also, underpaid, underperforming Philly wide out Desean Jackson held a big ass party for his birthday this past weekend on his meager 600 k salary. The video is worth a gander D Jax party . The party had to have cost him atleast 3/4ths of his salary. D Jax ass party

In NBA lockout news Deron Williams team in Turkey, in which he played all of 15 games for retired his jersey in his final home game before returning home to play for the Nets.

Also ex-presidential hopeful Ralph Nader wrote a nasty letter to NBA commish David Stern this week criticizing him for holding 3 games on Christmas day and subsequently “hijacking” Americans of their holiday because people will want to watch overpaid children run up and down the court for 48 minutes instead of spending time with their families. Stern responded the next day by flipping Nader the proverbial bird and adding an additional 2 games to the X-mas day schedule.

The interesting part of this story was that Nader accused Stern of “dickering” with the holiday proving that the word “dickering” is actually a word. Which is……awesome!

And last but not least in the Mullets attempt to make you a hockey fan; The great one Wayne Gretzky stopped his hot ass daughters Twitter account after she posted these fucking smoking pictures The greatest one proving that although he owns every fucking record in the NHL books his greatest achievement is his daughter The Greatest one

Let’s get ready to rumble in B-Town Saturday at 5:30!

The Mullet is out like Anthony Davis’s unibrow!

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One response

  1. Dying laughing at your Erin Andrews comment. Miss your face, DJ! Love your blog and I’m not a big sports fan. 🙂

    December 6, 2011 at 1:08 pm

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